JOEY AND BOBBY EXPLORE TRUMP’S AMERICA

(I saw an internet meme similar to this and I thought I would expand on it. I tried to find it again but with all the election stuff going on it proved difficult.)

2014

Joey: I can’t believe Donald Trump is thinking about running for President.  What is our country coming to when men like him are having their names seriously considered?

Bobby: Joey, you worry too much man!  He said he was going to run both  2012 and way back in 2000. Nothing ever came of it.  He is just trying to promote viewers for his dippy TV show.  Have a little more faith in America.

2015

 Joey: He’s doing it, he is actually doing it! Donald Trump is running for the Republican nomination.  He even seems to have a large following.

Bobby: So we have a bunch of over excited Apprentice fans.  Trump is clown.  Did you see him in the debates when talking about his hands? He is an exposed fool and is going nowhere.

"Big Hands"

2016

Joey: This election is getting very tight.  He bombed the debates but he isn’t slowing down.  I was originally going to vote for Stein because I couldn’t vote for Sanders.  But I think I have to vote for Hilary now, I don’t want Trump.

Bobby: Look at the polls, Trump doesn’t stand a chance.  He is going to get his butt handed to him.  I refused to be scared to vote for a candidate that I don’t really like.  We need to vote our values, Trump won’t win anyway.  Look at the polls. 

Keeps talking even if it isn't his turn.

2018

Joey: I don’t like what’s going on here it’s like the President is in pissing contest with other world leaders.  In his last speech he says he’ll fire the nukes if he doesn’t get compliance.  President Trump said the he will fire the nukes!

Bobby: President Trump may be a jerk but he is not insane.  He is just talking tough.  Everyone knows how bad it would be if he were serious.  No one is nuking anyone.

Nukes

2025

Joey: I thought living under a nuclear winter was bad, barley any sunlight and always food shortages.   But now we have nuclear mutated talking giant lizards.  Those lizards are smart.  I can’t believe not only are we fighting for our existence but it looks like we may no longer be the top species on the planet!    

Bobby: Last we’re going to do is take orders from giant lizards who just learned to talk!  We’re humans we’ll get through this.  We may have messed up a lot of things but we’ll always have our freedom for this planet is ours!

2029

Joey: {crying}  

 

Bobby: Joey, lighten up.  I’m glad you got here early I need some help cheering everyone up.  Now listen guys there are a lot of nasty rumors floating around.  So I want to make some things very clear.  I know my Giant Lizard Master loves me.  As I am sure yours loves you.  They would never do anything to hurt us.  That is why they have a veterinarian for humans, to take care of us.  Now I know our Lizard overlords would never castrate us in order to keep our population under control.  That is not what a loving master does.  Our masters need there workers reproducing.  We have nothing to fear.  Joey you were the first one here this morning tell we have nothing to fear.

Joey: {cries harder} I should have voted for Hillary.

 

Your Lizard Master!

On Tuesday go out and vote for Hillary Clinton.  In doing this you will save humanity, and if your a guy, also your balls. 

THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF THE DEBATE (TO ME)

As a reluctant supporter of Hillary Clinton, due to the fact that my preferred candidate never got in the race, I was very concerned going into Monday’s debate.  This is because I know Donald Trump was the more likable of the two.  This is part of what made him such successful media and ultimately reality TV personality.   It is this charisma that allows him to go on several racist rants, such as questioning a judge’s ability to be impartial because of Mexican ancestry or insulting gold star parents who lost their son, without the normal social consequences that would typically befall a candidate.   No matter what he says a good portion of his supporters brush it off like they would some random statement their crazy uncle made.  “He may be politically incorrect but at least his heart is in the right place.  He is not really racist he just says occasionally things that men of his generation say.”[1]   

                American presidential election history has shown when a more likable candidate goes against a person who perceived to be more experienced they have a built in advantage.  They don’t have to win the debate; all they have to do is look presidential and the voters will go with who they like.  Examples include Kennedy vs. Nixon in 1960 and Bush vs. Gore in 2000.  In both cases the more likable John F. Kennedy and George W. Bush were able to strengthen their candidacies against the incumbent Vice President, Richard Nixon and Al Gore[2].   In both years the incumbent party was coming off a popular presidency and they were expecting triumphant victory but what they got was a close race and the White House going to the challenger[3]. 

                So I was concerned that Donald Trump would follow this pattern.  Fortunately America ended up seeing the worst debate performance in presidential history, surpassing even 1976 when Gerald Ford seemingly forgot the Iron Curtain existed.   

                For me, the most important part of this debate was not Trump admitting he doesn’t pay taxes, his frequent interruptions of Clinton when it was her turn to speak, admitting he didn't pay taxes, or coming unhinged while claiming he had great temperament.  To me the issue was his birtherism, and how he is so proud of himself for creating enough noise in the media to get Obama to release his birth certificate. 

                The reason I find this so important because I remember it when it first happened.  Trump flew in down in one of this Trump helicopters stood in front of reporters and announced how deeply proud of himself that he had harassed the first African-American President to the point he had to show his papers.  Here is a video of that day.

                When this memory was triggered another memory immediately popped up.   Trump’s replaying his pompous pride of his birther roots brought back not only the memory of his foolish helicopter press conference, but a more pleasant memory of national nightmare ending when in less than a week after Trump’s prideful announcement  President Obama announced this:

                He was dead.  The number one of the United States of America in the 21^st century, Osama Bin Laden was dead.  U.S. Seal Team 6, acting under the orders of the President, went into Pakistan and killed him.  Just as then-Senator Obama had promised to do during the 2008 campaign. 

Bin Laden

                So while Donald Trump was looking in Hawaii for a birth certificate for a man whose birth was announced in the local newspaper nine days after he was born, our President was hunting down the most horrific terrorist in U.S. history.  He wouldn’t stop with Bin Laden either.

So talk about priorities!  While Trump worked on his TV show and mounted a campaign saying one hurtful remark after another, President Obama was making America safe from its enemies by crippling the organization of al-Qaeda by killing off all its leaders.  It was quite an improvement over the previous president who vowed to bring them to justice but got lost in Iraq.  President Obama took the fight right to the enemies by, in his words, “using a scalpel not a hammer” to solve problems.

                

            Donald Trump was proud of himself for his work as birther, I however am proud of my President.

{Rule on comments any comment that doesn't directly refer this post will be deleted.}

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[1] Those are the least scary of his supporters, the worst ones are those who hear his bigoted statements and get excited by them.

[2]  To be fair both Nixon and Gore also made serious errors in their respective debates.  Nixon refused to wear makeup not understanding how that would reflect on his appearance on television and Gore kept sighing and going on about his “lock box.”

[3] Although in Gore’s case he won the popular vote.